Toddler Trainer Pillows

Baby on a potty holding up a No.2 sign.

'She won't be happy until we all join her stupid 12-step program.'

A child running around the block

"It's my baby sister's. She leaked when we got her, and we've been trying to fix her ever since."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

The Baby Walker

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

Dog Walking Services

A midwife holding a baby

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

"Any questions?"

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Coping with a strong-willed child

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Any questions?"

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

"When did she start crawling?"

"He's such a fussy eater."

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

Hanging off every word...

Quality Control

"Excuse me a moment, whilst I just change hats."

"Just go with the workflow."

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."