Toddler Phase Transition Pillows

"No more diapers. Simply lift the lid and go here."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

Swan Fairy Tales

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

The No No No's

"When did she start crawling?"

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

'At lone at last.'

"I don't care how good he is. Ain't nobody can get a short on Jeffrey."

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

"Has your mom tried turning him off and back on again?"

Fat Kid 23- Catches a bogie

"I'm so good at this!"

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

'It's not scatting if they're under age two.'

"Where's your nose?"

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

'Beware of teething baby.'

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

"We'd love to come, but we can't seem to find a sitter."

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

"No, it's still just a thirst for spaghettios."

Oh, sorry, it's in airplane mode.""

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

"No, I wasn't in a car accident. As a new parent, I'm still trying not to trip on all the toys on the floor."

"They say you're as smart as a 2-year-old child? As a 2-year-old...I don't see it!"

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

"She does this when she's tired."