Tobacco Debater Gifts

'...now they want to tax to death one thing that gives people pleasure.'

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"Let me assure you that my congressional delegation and I are devoting our full attention to the harmful effects of e-cigarettes. . ."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

Profits for Big Pharma

Antibiotics versus probiotics: A battle of wills.

'Medical researcher have isolated the gene that makes us want to discuss our ailments with anyone we meet.'

Vaping cigarette

"Me, not self-sufficient? Who was it who self-published a self-help on self-medicating?"

"You're right, Obamacare doesn't cover everything."

"All right, let's admit genetically-modified foods will have an effect on people. It's fifty-fifty it'll be a good effect."

"Dealing with a poorly informed public over GM crops is a nightmare...."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"The new lockdown guidelines are that up to ten people can go to funerals and ten thousand to demonstrations."

"This drug has such pleasant side effects I consider them value-added."

"The budget wouldn't stretch to a gastric band."

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.

Children of the Genetically Modified Corn

An eye doctor tests a patient's eyesight by having him read an eye chart that starts with "Fight Socialized Healthcare...".

'The good news is we can still get abortions.'

"I'd offer you a tissue, but I'm afraid your insurance won't cover it."

Quack Medicine

Anti-Vaxxers aren't stupid. They just need to be convinced!

'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'

'-OK, if you elect not to have the surgery, the insurance company offers six days and seven nights in Barbados.'

"It's a new class of drugs to combat depression. They're called recreational."

"I'm an anti-masker."

G.M. leaf.

"Um...David, a word if we may."

"Are you going to dispense candy with that mouth?"

"We're incompatible. . . He's anti-mask and I'm anti-vax!"

'You have a 'can't do anything right disease'.'

'Ready, set,...'

Maria Sharapova

Miss-Information: "I'm not planning on being vaccinated. . . People should have the right to catch covid and die!"