Title Enthusiast T-Shirts

"I got my PhD in Nursing just so people would have to call me Doctor."

'Please don't call me Mr. Carruthers. Mr. Carruthers is my father. I'm Dr. Carruthers.'

'Actually, I don't see myself as a thought leader, but more of a thought manager."

'Not only does the babysitter want more money, she now wants to be referred to as a child-care specialist!'

"Hi, I'm Dr. Jenkins." "Nice to meet you. I'm Bachelor of Science Johnson."

'Instead of a raise, Yomp, you may call me 'Chief', instead of Mr Staghorn.'

'Nice to meet you. Plumber Greg.'

"I'm not a babysitter; I'm a child care provider!"

"I was promoted from customer care executive to senior master customer care executive. That means 12 more letters."

Big cheese

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

"Want to find out if you're also king of the swamp?"

Lady walking a dog with a big tail.

'You shouldn't have.'

"...and you call yourself a computational immunotox-pharmacological an-diffracctiion bimolecular therapeutic ononclonal-antibody genomic metabolic-endocrinologist."

The Boss.

Tom Cruise

'Would you feel less inferior if I made you a Colonel?'

Naming that Impala

J.P.Hensmore Superintendent AKA Head Honcho, The Big Guy,The Man, Numero Uno and The Big Cheese.

"Congratulations J.L., I hear you're getting another 'really' in your title."

"To maintain proper respect for management, you have to call me 'Boss Joey!' Unless, you know, you don't want to."

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

"Certainly. A party of four at seven-thirty in the name of Dr. Jennings. May I ask whether that is an actual medical degree or a Ph.D.?"

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.

'He calls himself a philanthropist, but would prefer Lord Philanthropist.'

Best Sellers; Worst Sellers.

"As I see it, the issue with dog-walking services is that the pace is dictated by whoever is slowest..."

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

That's Roderick Sloan, the Alvin Meriwether professor of business administration, and with him is Alvin Meriwether, the Roderick Sloan professor of economics.

Mr Long and Miss Short.

List making as therapy.