Tiny Socialite T-Shirts

'I have kindergarten burnout!'

'I've got to go, Mom -- my playgroup called an emergency meeting.'

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

The Modern Novel.

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Children's Party

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

"He's so into social media that he's become anti-social."

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

"Whoa! Wrong bar?"

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

Online marriage ceremony.

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Happy thanksgiving!"

"Brian's considering the optics."

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

"I didn't even know Smallville had a set!"

"I think it’s time we started holding other kids’ hands."

A day at the races

'Fill 'er up Fred!'

'Can I get you anything? Coffee? A biscuit?...A lift home?'

Dog Teenagers

"This is the Upper East Side, sir. We don’t sell ‘well’ vodka."

"Either you're emitting the scent of power, or your phone battery is about to explode."

"Francophobe meet Francophile."

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

"Your party just totally blew us away."

"Please try not to offer expert analysis."

"I want you two to meet some people who just bought a fabulous five-story brownstone with a garden in Troy, New York."

'Can anybody here separate their fingers and if so will you pour?'

'Oh, we've met. We were once married to one another.'