Timepiece Tickler Gifts

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

Beware of Watchdog.

Lyme Disease Research Lab

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

Biological Cuckoo clock

Keyboard player

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

Shirley knew that Dennis would love his new 'Tackling Grunts of Famous Linebackers' clock.

'I need to reset his internal clock...does anyone have the correct time?'

Dickens' Counterfeit Rolex.

Super Homeworld

Farmer to son: 'For heaven's sake Jeb! Get Bessie out of that tall grass now! Can't you see she's full of ticks?!'

Victor Borge.

Professor in time machine at the end of a battle "Damn watch!"

Either one of us is pregnant, or he's lost his watch again!

'The main reason I took up the piano was, it's the only musical instrument that gives you a place to set your wine.'

"Is that a new watch?"

"Yes, I'm still on hold and counting the billable minutes."

'Is this A.M. or P.M.?'

Cuckoo Clock Dentistry

Cuckoo clock gotcha.

'Dad! What time is it when the big hand is on eight and the little hand is all over the floor?'

"What you call a lump of rock, Zog, I call a timepiece."

'Agnes, do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?'

'Piano Player'

"Eww! A tick!"

"O.K., I'm going to demonstrate the proper way to lie to me about flossing."

The end of the world is nigh - Get your specially adapted clock here

"Have you got anything that doesn't look like a pressure gauge from the Titanic?"

'What do you mean, you can't look at the Milky Way because you're lactose-intolerant?'

Clock and bird

'I thought it'd be great having a watch that did your laundry but now I'm starting to regret buying it.'

Man in hourglass is falling through quicksand.

Organ Player

Watch Shop. Returns. Mister Dali, here, says his wristwatch melted.