Time-wasting Philosopher Mugs

"Glad I'm not self employed, I've wasted the entire day."

"Trust me kiddo, even donkey's years fly by way too fast..."

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"Can that be right?"

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"It's a 670 page questionnaire on how to cut back on unnecessary bureaucracy!"

'I thought time was supposed to be money!'

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

Snail Coach

Children's games and technology

"Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock, tick tock."

'Do you have anything for absent-mindedness?'

Childhood Screen Addict

Remember how I came in on December 31st and ordered a lardo-size fudgsicle sugarbomb mocha with butter sprinkles? Well, give me another one of those. Since it's something I originally had last year, it'll be like I had this one last year too. So it won't violate my New Year's resolution. The ancient art of Time-Shift-Fu. I'm a tenth level grand master. I studied under Moe Yin, the master who created "it's not really 'cheating' if it's with an ex."

"You seem very remote."

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

'Time-outs might have more meaning when I learn to tell time.'

Bummer Time Streaming

'If the Sun doesn't explode in five billion years, do you realize how foolish we'll look?'

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

"Oh my God -- I just remembered I can fly."

"Sometimes I wish they'd never perfected setless television."

Elderly man at top of stairs with a revolver and an axe: 'I've completely forgotten why I came upstairs.'

"Honey, I'll be right back – I forgot to stop at the bar on the way home."

Man reading 'Amnesia volume 1' while having a bookshelf full of 'Amnesia Volume 1'

'No dear, I do not think it's time we homo sapiens apologised to the Neanderthals.'

"All the poetry I have inside me is being eaten by my vampire phone."

"If I ever feel that life's moving too fast, I just stand in the prescriptions queue..."

The brain cell that was suppose to help me remember.

Man in a desert looks up to see a sand timer sprinkling sand below.

"Poop. I forgot my coffee mug was on the roof of the saucer."

"I forgot to call in dead."

'Do you need me to remind you when your wife's birthday is too?'

'Bloody warmongers!'