Tidal Thinker T-Shirts

"Welcome to the panel of wave and tidal experts."

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

Chicken soup for the sole.

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

'I gotta bad feeling about this.'

"Don't do it - they're trying to beat us at our own game."

'This should succeed...it's not aimed at anything.'

The Use of Cavalry

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

"Cat got your tongue?"

'It was definitely a bang. You heard it, I heard it, end of discussion.'

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

High tide.

"On the contrary. I think the Carribbean countries have a great many education practices that are worth studying."

"The perfect killing machine? Is that all I am to you?"

'Bugger! My brain's just pulled a hammy.'

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

'If the Sun doesn't explode in five billion years, do you realize how foolish we'll look?'

Chess player painting all the pieces his colour.

'I'm too small for my age: I keep being rejected...'

'Ever have one of those days where nothing seems to go right?'

"Delivery."

'There goes the world's largest fish.' (fish bowl)

'And that's the quickest way out of the car park after the game.'

"Being a leader means you have the ball, what are you going to do with it?"

"Whose great idea was the four four two formation."

Fish-losophy

A patient's heart monitor reveals he is thinking about fish.

"OK, that was the ebb tide. Now we wait for the neap tide."

Descartes' dog.

'There has to be a wee bit more to tidal power than THAT, Andy.'

Rock, paper, scissors

'Oh, look on the bright side. At least I'm not a 500 pound Bengal tiger.'

If swimming is such a good way to lose weight, how do you explain whales?

"I can actually hear you thinking about food."