Tidal Thinker T-Shirts

"Welcome to the panel of wave and tidal experts."

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

'This should succeed...it's not aimed at anything.'

"Don't do it - they're trying to beat us at our own game."

The Use of Cavalry

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

'It was definitely a bang. You heard it, I heard it, end of discussion.'

"Cat got your tongue?"

"On the contrary. I think the Carribbean countries have a great many education practices that are worth studying."

High tide.

"The perfect killing machine? Is that all I am to you?"

'Bugger! My brain's just pulled a hammy.'

'If the Sun doesn't explode in five billion years, do you realize how foolish we'll look?'

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

Chess player painting all the pieces his colour.

'I'm too small for my age: I keep being rejected...'

'Ever have one of those days where nothing seems to go right?'

"Delivery."

'There goes the world's largest fish.' (fish bowl)

"I can actually hear you thinking about food."

Rock, paper, scissors

"OK, that was the ebb tide. Now we wait for the neap tide."

A patient's heart monitor reveals he is thinking about fish.

'And that's the quickest way out of the car park after the game.'

If swimming is such a good way to lose weight, how do you explain whales?

"Being a leader means you have the ball, what are you going to do with it?"

'There has to be a wee bit more to tidal power than THAT, Andy.'

'Oh, look on the bright side. At least I'm not a 500 pound Bengal tiger.'

"Whose great idea was the four four two formation."

Descartes' dog.

'If the universe is expanding, shouldn't we invest?'