Thrifty Learner Gifts

'College textbooks sure are expensive. Luckily, I saved a fortune by using eTexts. Now I have to see if I can buy used eTexts.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

"I'm still pre-literate."

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

'I did it all from memory.'

Scientist has note on chalkboard: E=mc2 + 6% sales tax.

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

Education and Apprenticeships

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

'What can you get with a quarter?'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

"And today children, Homer is going to show us his 'pressed fly and bug collection'."

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

The Bargain Brand

How much would you take off for cash?

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

"We could have a Do-It-Yourself wedding! Your friends could do the cake and flowers, Uncle Jim could do the photos..."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

'If the pound is worth so little, can I have a couple?'

"C'mere, space heater."