Thrift Thinker T-Shirts

"Don't take it personally. No one is getting as many credit card offers as before."

"I guess I'll just sit here since I can't risk being seen wearing everybody's stuff. On a more positive note, I'm actually saving money."

Thrift: Try talking without vowels

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Second hand furniture.

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

Queen of Upcycling!

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"I love these old decorations!"

"I just..."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

"There's more inside."

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

Vintage Dresses: Your Frock Exchange

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

"Enough with the garage sales, Harold."

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."