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'I'm sensing you may still have some boundary issues.'

"I never discuss my clients with their mothers."

The Mixed Vegetable Personality Inventory

"Apparently you're a bi-polar bear."

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

Fear of Abandonment Support Group

Shock Therapy

Carl Rogers: A psychic mechanism is a need for positive regard from others. (I don't think he likes me...)

"You have to remember you're not responsible for other people's happiness."

'I can see you're going to be a bit of a challenge.'

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

"We talked about the strange man yanking your ears last week. We need to look at what else is bothering you."

Anger Management.

"I know it seems cruel, but it's the only way for him to get rid of that silly technophobia."

'So what did you do with a problem like Maria?'

'I suffer from depression too Ms Frost. Sometimes I'm not even motivated to get out of bed!'

Novel/Novel Therapeutic Strategies

'It looks like someone tried to pronounce 'Rorschach' with a mouthful of soup.'

'You can't resolve every disagreement by saying, 'off with your head!''

"Perhaps the doll substitution therapy wasn't the best choice!"

"I just don't seem to be able to hold things together."

"It didn't work...I'm still angry with management."

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

'The pain in my head always seems to subside when I flush your bills down the toilet!'

'What are you doing?' - 'I'm practising being depressed.' - 'Why would anyone practise being depressed?' - 'If you want to excel at anything you have to keep practising at it.' - 'If you want to excel at anything you have to keep practising at it.'

"There you go, oversimplifying things again."

'Nine years of this, and all you can tell me is, 'If I'm not mistaken'?...'

'I feel OK. I was hoping to do better than that.'

'I feel disappointed. I thought group therapy would be more fun.'

Group Therapy: Get Your Free Bumper Sticker Here - Misery Loves Company.

'I never argue with him until he opens his stupid mouth!'

Fred's Bar: Dealing with Anger in Positive ways.

'I see you've been chasing parked cars again. Wanna talk about it?'

The human race. When did I lose it?