Thelwell Admirer T-Shirts

Hook to Gut

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

High security Santa's grotto

"I would like a tube of lemon yellow, cadmium red, cobalt blue, ivory, black, and zinc white, a sixteen-by-twenty canvas, a couple of brushes, and that book 'Painting in Oils'."

Elfie Stick

Hildegard von Bingen

Sistine Selfie

The Death Of Venus

Reasonableman

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

"Which way to the Mona Lisa? We're double-parked."

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

"He begged his wife and kids to join him in Tahiti, but he didn't mean a word of it, the bastard."

Blue Dress

Robert Schumann

Joseph and his coat

Man getting hot looking at picture of desert.

Charles Baudelaire

Museum. It's a shame life isn't like European history with a renaissance following middle ages! (Published originally on May 26, 2013.)

Teddy Roosevelt

Hans Holbein

"This was his real breakthrough piece."

A Night In the Art Gallery

You're my Mona Lisa.

Antiques

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

J. M. W. Turner

Shakespeare

Little girl imitating a painting in an art gallery

"The last doggy bag."

The British Hamlet. He says: 'Alas poor Yorick, I knew him ... well, I say knew, more of an acquaintance really. Only met the chap three or four times.'

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

Mangle

'What?'