Theater Night T-Shirts

'The Stalls, Covent Garden Opera'

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

An audience with the king.

"Bond James, Bond."

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

They hated me.

"Just be yourself."

Showbiz Awards

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'They all want to play the star.'

Herman Mankiewicz

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Tut and Carmen.

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

Jean-Paul Sartre

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"Extreme miming"

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

Papageno from The Magic Flute

Women's Bonnets Block the Audience View

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

'Hamlet'