Theater-loving Tax Expert Gifts

Dance of the sugar plum tax attorneys.

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

'I've figured out a way to lower your income tax...give you less income.'

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

Stimulus bust

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

'You Americans call it 'Illegal Tax Evasion'? Well, here in Europe, we call it 'Monaco Effect Investments''!

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

"I now represent both death and taxes."

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'

'Even if we did skin you last year, you may not deduct your dermatologist bill this year.'

The High School of Music and Art and Economics

'It's tax avoidance crackdown avoidance.'

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

"Bad debts, yes, but you can't deduct bad trips."

"So let me see... for your last will you have decided to bequeath all your unpaid tax bills to your ex husband."

'This is great fiction! My cousin, an agent in Hollywood, may be able to sell book and movie rights.'

tax

"Here's a new bill to pay...intellectual property tax!"

"It's not fair that we have to pay taxes on something we don't have - last year's income."

'I feel sure I'm paying too little tax, who do I see about it?'

irs, 'You were wrong -- they WEREN'T more afraid of me than I was of them.'

'This rebate check isn't big enough for both of us.'

Tax relief

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

"Think of the raising of taxes as a motivational tool to go out and make more money."

'The hair-raising twists and turns, the mystery, numbing assault on the mind...THAT'S why I love tax law!'

I.R.S. - A non-discriminatory federal agency. We Soak rich and poor alike.

American's Funniest Tax Decuctions

'Sorry to interrupt - your monastery is on fire...the IRS wants to talk to you - and something about a missing case of wine.'