The Soup Enthusiast Gifts

'Right you lot, listen. Hands up for soup. . .'

Soup of the month.

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

'Excuse me, I ordered Matzo Ball soup.'

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

'It feels warm enough to me.'

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

Bottomless bowl of soup

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

"We're out of today's soup, but you can have tomorrow's soup from yesterday which is the same as today's."

"Waiter, there's a hair in my soup!"

Your friends pooled their retirements to buy you some super sex. I'll take the soup! Hey, I like soup.

What's the insect de jour?

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

Alphabet Soup: Ingredients - consonants and vowels.

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

'Exactly what day is this the soup of?'

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

'Waiter, there's a cell phone in my soup.'