Test Tamer Mugs

'I think prayer in schools is necessary as long as Mrs. Smith gives hard math tests.'

Need an elevated state of mind too!

"I got a 95% on the test. What did you get?"

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Secretive Weigh In.

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

To do before Saturday...

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

'He works out aggression by bayoneting the leaves.'

Busy office.

(No caption. Signs on file cabinets drawers read, "Files Saved to Hard Drive," "Files Saved to Disk," "Files Saved to Traveldrive," "Trash.")

"I lost 20lbs on my diet. I guess it's time for a relapse."

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

'They've been in there all day writing the job description.'

'He left for the office in a bit of a temper!'

Dentist Training School.

"Would you buy the apple pie for me? I'm on the 'No You Don't!' Diet."

"Oops! My mistake, that was your projected trial load for this year, not this month."

'Storm'

Childhood Screen Addict

'I told you he had a temper.'

"I replaced my G.P.S with auto correct, and every time I try to go right, it makes me go write...."

"Pick me! No me! Me! Pick me! Pick ME!"

'Please have the bouncer throw me out before the dessert course.'

'It's an emergency! The sitter wants to know where Marmaduke's doggie treats are!'

"Kid, I'm begging you, please stop farting."

You will do as I command...'It had a power surge.'

'OK, Connor. Tell me about this big, scary monster that you feel is under your bed at night.'

"I've got a lap dog and a laptop cat."

"Our driverless smart car texted me saying it went to get an oil change because I was too lazy to do it. Is there a way to disable its rudeness?"