Territory Claimant Gifts

'. . . I marked this territory a month ago!'

'Son, someday this will all be yours. Or Wal-Mart's. Whoever pays Daddy the most.'

You thought YOU hated YOUR job?

"You're darned RIGHT it's a serious problem! Sales people, like goldfish, grow to fit their tanks! He's got to be transferred to a bigger territory, PRONTO!"

"I see you have experience marking territory."

'Sorry. Your accident insurance doesn't cover that kind of incident.'

"We represent a North Carolina trade association and we'd like to file suit against the Native Americans for introducing our clients to a certain agricultural product."

"Rex, come up here and mark your territory."

"I finally have my very own place where I can do what I want in my parents basement."

'To prevent fraud, we like to verify whiplash injury claims!'

Claiming the North Pole for Mother Russia isn't as much fun as I thought.

"I heard they bought thousands of acres around here."

'As you can see, your sales region is quite large.'

The Land Grab: Then and Now

The first sign of cowboy trouble.

"OK! OK! I get the message! Your recliner, not mine!"

"I've sold my airspace."

Man caught trespassing having fallen through ice

"That's chemical law for you. No matter how minor the damage claim, our fee is always major."

'Insurance Adjuster Rejector of the Year' 'Claims Delayed and Claims Paid Promptly'

'I have to go and mark my domain.'

"Never again will there be such opportunity in real estate."

"It's dangerous territory you're taking on, Adams. Our legal people are drafting your will for you as a precaution..."

The dominant male leaves a pungent marker to identify his territory. It's a warning to others...keep away!

"I was hoping you had no more territorial ambitions."

'This is my favorite place in the whole world.'

'It feels oddly familiar.'

Landowner Counts Sheep

Home Owner's Insurance Adjuster of the Year

"Declaw ME, will they..."

The Wrongs of Ireland

"If you look carefully you'll see that all claims are invalid except on alternate Tuesdays in June and when Venus is in alignment with Mars."

'Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, because I own the damn valley.'

'I sue DEAD people.'