Tentacle Tamer T-Shirts

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"

Lets push tentacles he says Lets push tentacles! NOW look at the mess we're in...

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Secretive Weigh In.

To do before Saturday...

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

"I lost 20lbs on my diet. I guess it's time for a relapse."

"Do you remember ordering 1,345 cans of tuna?"

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

Parenting Business Deals

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

"I wish he'd slow the hell down." "I wish he'd hurry the hell up."

"Would you buy the apple pie for me? I'm on the 'No You Don't!' Diet."

Education Guidance

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

"She does this when she's tired."

Getting the Christmas Tree Home.

'Mr Godzilla - you need anger management!'

"So...what are you in for?"

'Please have the bouncer throw me out before the dessert course.'

Yeah, ok. I'll hold onto the two termites until this is over.

He collects a wide range of tackle and knows precisely how to use it.

'Now, you'd better pick up your toys or no bath!'

"You goo-goo, you gaa-gaa. But when push comes to shove, you whaa-whaa."

"Pick me! No me! Me! Pick me! Pick ME!"

"Of course you feel great. These things are loaded with antidepressants."

"I don't care what the job pays. . . I'm never herding cats again!"

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

"Sealed for your diets protection."

'There goes the world's largest fish.' (fish bowl)

"It seems that every time I get rid of those last stubborn ten pounds, those darn girl scouts come around with their cookies!"

"Dude, you gotta get out here and clean this pool more often."