Television Tension Taster T-Shirts

'If you don't want to know the scores please exercise your distrust of the BBC now.'

"States of tofu"

Tension filled the tent.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'And that's how to make pancakes.'

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

"Is this a dagger I see before me?"

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Eating raw cake mix.

'We first met here - when I was doing your job.'

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

'Telling them there is no meaning to life only ruins it for the rest of us.'

Two boys rehearsing,

"I just don't see a future for us Jane, our Netflix wish lists are just too different."

"You're retaining water. Stop eating sponge cake."

"I knew I didn't need the Death by Chocolate."

"Come to the dark side."

'. . . of course, batteries are not included.'

'How are you enjoying the ups and downs of equatorial swimming?'

"Here comes fury without purpose."

Devils and Angels

Evil Personified $1.00

'It's okay - they're VITAMIN-ENRICHED chocolates!'

Slimline Santa

Twisted Peel annoys his doctor with a question about paracetamol.

Latest: Delia loves apples.

'I don't dare look at that dessert...but feel free to describe it to me in graphic detail!'

"It was thrilling, yet terrifying. I felt like a diabetic kid in a candy store."

Genetically modified food cafe

"Can I have a change of venue to another media judge on another network?"

Don't mind him, I'm incredibly famous and he is my fan

Dieter's 'To-Do' list...

70 degrees in Spring / 70 degrees in Fall