Teleportation Theorist Mugs

'Unfortunately, the aliens who abducted Leon had a 'Catch and Release' program.'

"You left this on our ship."

"Call me?"

Ideas Ahead of their Time

Jason and the Aga notes,

'Take me to your computer.'

Pentagon Science Contest: '...It's a contest by the pentagon. They're gonna pay out half a million bucks to someone who comes up with the best idea on how people could travel to another solar system.'

A car's soul escapes as it expires at the meter.

"After finally discovering that we exist, you would think you would have something more important to ask than if we had Roku."

'Remember when the authorities were notified when we were spotted? Now nobody cares. They think we're drones.'

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

Have you heard that time is not a constant, Randy? Of course, little buddy It's called "time dilation." Time moves slower for objects in motion than it does for objects that sit still. I'm a prime example. I haven't aged a day in decades. I still have rippling muscles, a smooth pelt, glistening teeth, twinkling eyes, a raging libido, and the boundless confidence of youth ... all because I'm always on the move. I'm writing a study on it for the Journal of Temporal Hotness. I've been meaning to as

"I always forget. Is this the day we spin ahead one hour?"

''Time is an illusion'? - How long did it take you to come up with that?'

Robot Attack in Bath

"OMG! A portal to another panel."

If only I had noticed the cow in the teleporter, I'd be accepting the Nobel prize now!

Anglo-Russian Trade Rivalry in China

When a nanosecond is forever.

'Of course we're not going to experiment on you. We needed another hand for our bridge game.'

"Ramses II was here."

Above a fisherman a flying saucer hovers dangling a worm on a hook.

Alien Shopping List: Milk, Bread, Bin Bags, Earthling.

'Time? Time's relative.'

I knew we didn't have enough blocks for this thing.'

'Did you try rebooting?'

Some other sins you may enjoy.

'You ask him to sing. I don't speak Italian.'

Astronomers argue theories of the Universe.

'You may find a few things have evolved since we abducted you for our research.'

'faster!'

"Hey, not so fast - I'm abducting her first!"

'I'd steer clear of them on the forth of July!'

"You're quite the pick up artist!"

Time Machine Assassination Squad