Telemarketing Pro Pillows

"Waiting for some customers to call?"

Where your mind & battle are los

"You know, there are other emojis."

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

'The classic masks of Comedy and Tragedy, or as they're now known, emoticons.'

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'This is Martins, the office I was telling you about. She's got a real knack for texting people down from window ledges!'

Mr. and Mrs. Angel

"People just don't realise how stressful this job is. . . I used to have hair!"

Modern Narcissism

LOOK BHIND U!

"Did you remember to cancel the scam phone calls?"

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."

Astronaut sees cell tower on the moon.

Aladdin and the magic telemarketer lamp. Your first 3 wishes are free!* *By accepting wishes, user agrees to lifetime monthly charges, activation fees, and all applicable taxes.

'Your call may be monitored to give us a few good laughs.'

'Our company needs a tougher image. So from here on out we'll answer the phone with the greeting, 'what the hell do you want?!'

"No, he's not on any antidepressants. His euphoric mood is coming from me installing a robocall blocker on his phone."

"Please stay on the line – your caul is important to us."

Eureka! This has telemarketing sale of a diet supplement written all over it.

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

'What's PPI and how did you get this number?'

"If you want to talk to someone uninterested, press 1..."

'I'm going to have to transfer you to someone I don't like.'

Cold caller.

"You. . . may. . . already. . . be. . . a . . . winner. . ."

'Your resume states that you've worked with 2 presidents, won the Nobel Prize and climbed Mt. Everest. That's all fine and dandy, but how are you at telemarketing?'

"No way! You're a telemarketer?! This is so great – hold on, I want to get comfortable ... how did you get my number?"

"Is that a finger?"

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

"Sell AI"

'Your resume states that you've worked with 2 presidents, won the Nobel Prize and climbed Mt Everest. That's all fine and dandy, but how are you at telemarketing?'

'No, I wouldn't like a free quote for central heating! Where did you get this number?'