Teenage Philosopher Pillows

"I think I'll be more relaxed once my secondary sex characteristics kick in."

'I just think everyone in the family should have the same rights and privileges.'

Lately I've had this creepy feeling that I understand my parents, but it's probably just Stockholm Syndrome.

'Life isn't fair. Just when girls get interesting, they get taller than us.'

"Dad, can I ask you a question...about girls?"

"I think I'm finally starting to understand my father."

"I'm NOT a TEENAGER, I'm a pre-adult!"

Biblical Teenager

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Could I ask just one question?"

"One year closer to college!"

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

Playdough's The Republic

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

I think I can, I think I can ... therefore I think I am...

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"