Teen Talk Admirer Pillows

"Seriously! My mother says she remembers when all you could do with a cell phone was make calls."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

Science Dept...Entomology: 'Too bad humans don't spend their teen years in pupa like insects.'

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"Sure I used drugs when I was your age, but they were all prescribed for acne."

'These are very powerful tranquilizers for when your teen has he horrific tantrums. Take two of them anytime she flares up.'

"Let's just do the top layer."

"My drone strikes are successful, Sir, but I keep getting trash talk from a 15 year old in Montana."

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

SAGE (unknown model)

"Yeah, I tried beaver once too, but I didn't like the woody after-taste..."

"They have been in a terrible mood these days. You know how painful it is when they start developing legs."

'Copy and study this list of text message spelling words. We will have test tomorrow.'

'Let's not jump into this.'

"How come you never get the kind of granola with the chocolate chips in it?"

'He's not really shy - just a bad skater.'

"Wow, that was short. You only talked for 45 minutes. What happened?"

'I can't stand the Three Stooges!' , 'Oh, an anti-Shempite, eh?'

'Baggy jeans are ideal for walking through puddles, your majesty.'

"Of course your parents embarrass you. That's what parents are for."

"A banana Grace left in my room four weeks ago."

Word up!

"We were hoping for something other than 'Whatever' as answers to our survey questions."

'Of course I bailed you out - you've got soccer tonight.'

'You did a great job explaining the 'birds and bees.' Try your hand at the 'empty nest.''

'My mum's just given me a positive talk about sex...'

Thoughts and Prayers

'Herbert's divorcing me. I just hope he doesn't make too much of a fuss when I tell him.'