Tee-time Champ Pillows

The Amateur Golfer

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

Do you want to win the game or my business?

'The grudge match.'

Golf lessons

'He lived and died for golf.'

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

"Can I play with your ball, Mister, if you're not using it?"

'You had a 9 on one, a 7 on two, a 10 on three, a 23 on four...that hurt...'

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

'You're away, Doc!'

Golf

'Whenever Ralph finds a golf ball he puts it in the basement.'

'Did you see a ball come this way?'

Welcome to Fairway...The town with 536 holes of golf!

A man holding a golf club eying up his shot

'What a divot?'

'So if it goes to the right it's a slice, to the left it's a hook...and down the center.'

'Would you like something from the trolley doctor ? '

Golfer couple just married

"Mind if we play through?"

"With my handicap I can park just about anywhere I want to!"

"I'm having a dry October. . . October 2045."

'You don't have to shout fore when you putt.'

King of the Swingers.

"My husband said he could fix anything so if you find him, tell him he was wrong!"

"I'm guessing this is the first time Jack's had a chance to make par?"

"Fore!"

"Yes, you can see the chairman this afternoon - have you ever done any caddying before?"

'I need a continuance, your Honor.'

'Gentlemen, today's meeting will be short, so I'll get right to the point.'

'See this advert? lost.. one little white ball!'

"That's a lovely tee-shot." - "Well, thank you, it matches my underpants."

'I am being in the moment. Just not this particular moment.'