Tee Shot Strategist Pillows

"You've got it to go straight but you're facing the wrong direction."

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Do you want to win the game or my business?

"Mom, no raking for me this fall! Got any more leaf bags?"

Golf lessons

"Dad! I can't believe we come to the beach and you set up all the way out here! I can barely see the ocean...we're so far from the wa..."

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

'You had a 9 on one, a 7 on two, a 10 on three, a 23 on four...that hurt...'

'Will you make the final table?'

"Don't rush me, I've got to get it right!"

"Go human."

'There's only one piece left. C'mon, we can figure this out.'

'The pro said my swing was out of this world.'

'So if it goes to the right it's a slice, to the left it's a hook...and down the center.'

'It's a nice course. I just wish it wasn't so close to the airport.'

"Yes, you can see the chairman this afternoon - have you ever done any caddying before?"

It is important that the aspiring golfer learns the meaning of certain golfing terms, so that he can understand what his fellow sportsmen are saying to him.

Where's your dad's car? Under this snow bank.

'World Popularity of Golf'

'Gentlemen, today's meeting will be short, so I'll get right to the point.'

'I like to relax before my business flights.'

Air Billiards

'That's quite an offset on your driver. Is that a new design?' 'No, it's an old design from beating it into the ground after years of lousy drives.'

'I am being in the moment. Just not this particular moment.'

'I don't understand it. That's my third tee shot that was headed right for the green and suddenly just died!'

'Sir, I would recommend the putter for your tee-shot.'

Where golfers come from.

"Can you withdraw your troops to the box in your bedroom?"

"Yeah, it's a modified super-soaker: a spit-soaker!"

"The blues in a terrible position"