Tee-off Tacticians Pillows

'It's a nice course. I just wish it wasn't so close to the airport.'

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

US and the EU

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

'He's been hiding out here for 20 years. Apparently, his buddies forgot to tell him the paintball tournament was over.'

Golf lessons

Vinnie's Billiards: 'Heck of a break, Ron!'

"But mom, all you said was 'get all your stuff up off the floor!' "

Carlo Ancelotti

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

Papa's Pizza delivered in under 30 minutes.

"We're looking for someone who'll be available twenty four-seven."

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

It's a tradition. On hole number 1 in the first round of the season, Ernie always says that's the best shot I've hit this year!

"Something's trying to get through the Astroturf!"

Human males marking territory.

'Boy, look at his personal space!'

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

The 18-hole course is to the left and a 9-hole course is to the right --- Which do you want to play? I'll decide after my first tee shot?

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

'Nice decorating. I like the clothes and toys everywhere...and the half eaten sandwich really ties it all together!'

I've left your pin on the map, but I've loosened it.

'Sir, our sales force has just taken Atlanta.'

Thanks God!

'Dad could use one of these when he's playing golf.'

'I wonder who they'll bring on as manager for the second half.'

Golf

"Isn't it about time you tidied up around here...?"

'The break is over, guys. It's time we got back to our 'Poker Addiction Support Group.''

'The pro said my swing was out of this world.'

'So if it goes to the right it's a slice, to the left it's a hook...and down the center.'

"You're getting a time-out because Mommy needs a time-out."

"Just take the crowd out of it. Imagine everyone is naked."