Technique Rebel Gifts

'You're the only person I know who takes divots on the green.'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

Lockdown casserole

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"I'm unable to process this image."

"I really got used to working from home."

'I never knew baking was such a violent activity. You have to beat the eggs, whip the cream, and mash the nuts.'

Institute for Artificial Intelligence.

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

"No flash in the ancient mummy gallery."

'I had the recipe upside down, so it's beefed corn.'

Woman reads Nigella Lawson cook book: 'Add butter to the mixture, remembering to moisten your lips ... whisk for three to four minutes, pouting throughout ...'

'I hate PowerPoint.'

Machine consciousness - a robot thinking. The thought is in the form of a printed circuit board. The robot is a clockwork toy robot, to emphasise the infancy of the concepts involved

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

Recipes.

'No you idiot! You're supposed to smash your guitar AFTER the show! What are you going to play now?'

Lou Reed

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

'Are you sure the recipe calls for a whole cup of good burgundy?'

"If you liked tonight's meal, you might enjoy 'Making The Meal,' a documentary with outtakes and commentary when the cook ran out of eggs because someone put an empty carton back in the refrigerator..."

Fuzz - the bass player auditions.

"Which one of my fiendish offspring defaced the bordelaise recipe with SpongeBob?"