Technical Skills Pillows

'There's new evidence that my departure from my previous employer merely coincided with their brain drain.'

"And I can install the latest version of Microsoft as well as Word and 17 other applications!"

In the Guru District

Jack of all trades

The Computer Bore

In the future, human thought will enter an age of clarity and purity never before dreamed of.

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

Early cyborg.

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

The Not-So Smart Meter

"It's so cute when the boss brings his son to work and pretends to let him help out!"

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

Computer Hitching a Ride to Silicon Valley

Congratulations on your retirement!

"Was that my pager or yours?"

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

High speed cinder block

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"

STRIP Hambone: Early diesel run computer

Battery Lighthouse

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"He excels at putting out fires."

'Imagine if it was this simple to upgrade our staff.'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

"Fact amnesty"

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Fixing the TV.