Techie In Training Pillows

'Young man, I don't like the look of that emoticon on your face!'

Jack of all trades

The Computer Bore

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Early cyborg.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

The Not-So Smart Meter

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

"I can't find my other boot. I need to be rebooted."

Congratulations on your retirement!

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

High speed cinder block

STRIP Hambone: Early diesel run computer

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

Battery Lighthouse

'Imagine if it was this simple to upgrade our staff.'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

Fixing the TV.

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'God?' Earth receives its first transmission from space.

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

'But I don't want to be able to turn on the toaster with the TV remote!'

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'The boss said to get rid of all the pirated software before he returns, which will be in about five to ten years.'

Early Tech Support

'It just dawned on me that every time we make a phone call, it's a robocall.'

It's a deal. You give me five analysts, three pundits, seven technicians and a soothsayer. I give you six experts, five professors, four consultants and a prognosticator.

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

'What a bunch of control freaks!'