Tech Versus Faith Fans Pillows

Submarine Sees Jesus Walking on Water

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

Why god isn't listening...

"I now offer DVR service for clients for want to see their future later."

'Uh-oh. They're bringing in the closer to secure the win.'

Escalator joust.

"What format shalt I save these in?"

'...and to speed up the collection process, donations can now be made by texting 'CHURCH' to 873346.'

'Number 1 on my fave 5 is Dial-A-Prayer.'

Church window shaped computer monitor.,

'It's my re-moat.'

"Could I get it as an ebook?"

Technophobes Illustrated Dictionary - Digitally Mixed - Any drink stirred without the use of a spoon, swizzle stick or any other tool/utensil.

'Please enter your sin, followed by the pound sign.'

'All the rest can scroll to Leviticus on your Bible software...'

''Unfriended' sounds so much more gentle than 'excomummunicated' does.'

"Use your finger to scroll down for the next five commandments."

"...And use it wisely."

Peter Cottontail's Blog.

"So, does God always call people to the ministry or can he text too?"

"I thought we were going to a different apple store."

"Dude, how many times have I told you that our radar is far more reliable than the GPS on your phone?"

"He used to squawk. Now all he does is tweet!"

'I think I liked it better up here when everyone just carried a HARP!!'

'Please swipe your gun and then enter your pin number. . .'

"My cell phone helped me quit smoking. Same size as cigarettes, even more diverting, and equally addicting."

"Dear Lord Elon, thank you for our daily tweet."

"Let's cross over, those LED street lamps give me a real buzz..."

"Sorry, but you've been 'Unfriended'."

"Never pay attention again!"