Tech-timid Soul Gifts

'Don't get smart with me!'

'Come out, come out, wherever you are!'

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Good old Frank. He was always thinking of others."

"Does the ark have wifi?"

Bob liked getting involved - but not actively involved.

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

'That's funny - the computer said we had mail..'

'I can't keep up with technology. Just when I finally learned how to use the fax machine they come out with Internet faxing.'

"I can accept Mum's gone, but I can't bring myself to press 'delete'."

"Banking, booking flights, shopping - there's no limit to what he can't do on the internet."

Orchestra playing to working man.

'When did everything go online? In my day we did our haunting in person.'

Welcome to Heaven: Please log in, using your password...

"Every time I offer them an upgrade, they click on 'not now'."

"What's all this I've been hearing about the Cloud?"

"Soulfie."

'You've stumped me with that question, I think that's something you need to Google'

"It says it's sick and tired of telling me to update my software and if I don't do it right now it's going to explode."

I know it's been ages since my last confession, but I trust you've been getting my texts?

'Open up Clayton, you knew it was inevitable.'

"A-ha, I've proven them wrong! The computer, my one and only friend, says I have high EQ."

Hell has no wi-fi.

2038: The Year the Lockdown Ended

'When I type in your name plus sin, sir, there are over twenty million results.'

"Your kids can do this in 10 seconds"

"They used to be symbols, but now they just pick up wi-fi."

"Baldo, how can I create a new folder so I can move these files but not these others?"

'Just so you know, the spoiler alert didn't ease the pain of being dumped.'

A "club"?--- but you know I'm a technophobe.

"Hey, Dad! Did you get the Covid app?"

To say Mrs. Banks had a hard time getting the hang of technology was an understatement.

'Do you know how much it would COST to get wi-fi out here?'

"He's afraid of getting on the computer. Or as I call it, cyberinsecurity."