Tech Team Member T-Shirts

"Our tech team has figured out why you've been so unproductive. Apparently, your computer is over 20 years old. We've ordered you a new one."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

"Let's start with an icebreaker..."

'Ted, I really wish you'd update your presentation software so we could do away with the 3-D glasses.'

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

'Hey, I'm not paying you people to watch the clock. That's Henderson's job.'

"Was that my pager or yours?"

"I'll be glad when they invent PowerPoint."

Computer Hitching a Ride to Silicon Valley

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"Your job is to build an app that replaces you."

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

'It's my own fault. I never upgraded my skills. I was replaced by a man half my age with a more advanced smartphone and hundreds of productive apps.'

S.S.dot.com

'Early Laptops.'

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

"Hey, you gotta put that away- this is a laptopless bar."

"He said his screen is frozen again."

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

"Fact amnesty"

'No no Mr. Peters, you are not being outsourced. You are being virtualised in 'the cloud'.'

Tech support...can I help you!

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

"It's not your phone service... you're talking into a spring roll."

Laid off from a dot-com? Ask about our resume-writing software.

"What the hell sort of convenient new feature is this?"

Welcome to Teamville, Population: 7 ... great people to work with.

"Whoa - not so fast! I've got to check your browsing history first..."

'I got a job working for Google Earth.'

"Ruddy AI. Bad enough to be replaced by a computer, never mind a COFFEE MAKER."

Elon Musk upset that 'X'is still referred to as 'Twitteer'.

Maybe I should subscribe to the newspaper again.