Tech Taster Pillows

Comparative Review of the New York Post and its App

Genetically modified food cafe

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"States of tofu"

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"I use broccoli rabe as a litmus test."

High speed cinder block

'To make up for the decline in snail mail deliveries, I've taken to biting my master every time he gets an e-mail.'

'And that's how to make pancakes.'

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

"Well, team, we've been officially disqualified. You can come out of there, Tyler."

Baby at Christmas Dinner

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

"I only have two apps on my phone. One makes me spend all my money and the other gives me embezzling tips."

STRIP Hambone: This one's a great little number cruncher!

"Done Dad! I've hacked the dog's social media account and flooded it and his contacts with links to cat videos..."

'We use that computer strictly for the office grapevine.'

"Never mind if you're good with people. Can you hack?"

'Hon, come quick! I think we have a major computer bug.'

'The new helium airbag was a mistake.'

'I got tattoos of all my passwords.'

I'm a seat warmer test dummy.

'We first met here - when I was doing your job.'

Kids hiding plug to giant machine.

"I never ask for a raise any more. I just hack into the boss's computer and give myself one."

'Okay, here's how your contributor's brand new machine works! Now give me my money!'

"Column A are things they said would kill you ten years ago but are now considered totally good for you. Column B are things they currently think will kill you."

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

Cyber crime.

Cow Printer

"So you want to sue NASA because the Mars Rover is blocking your driveway while taking soil samples?"

'This is just a hologram of Wilkins! That's the 12th employee this month who has pulled this stunt!'

'Telling them there is no meaning to life only ruins it for the rest of us.'

"Do you like my new, squirty flower app?"