Tech Tantrum Pillows

Streaking makes a comeback, but nobody notices.

'The principal is keeping my teacher after school. She kicked the computer.'

Computers. Tablets. Laptops. The model is entirely voice-activated. I've always wanted to tell a computer "off."

"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

"My computer still won't work. It must still hold a grudge from when I punched it in frustration."

'You are through to 24/7 support...our helpline times are between 8am and 7pm.'

Menu. Will you do it? It'll cost you -- Two lattes. Fine. Just do it. Ok, stand back. You stupid #*& phone. Stop disconnecting my calls, you #*&% jerk! It needed doing, but I couldn't yell at my own phone. That felt wonderful.

"Sorry, but road rage is next door. This room is for people who get frustrated with their compute and take it out on their keyboards."

"We usually shop in the comfort of our own home but the bloody computer crashed."

Heck Support.

Internet crap.

"They call it the Cloud. No wonder I Can't find anything in it."

'You used foul and offensive language when addressing your computer. Well....we've all done that.'

Divorce lawyer "Then it's final, you get the computer as you requested and your wifes gets the house, car and everything else"

Computer frustration

'Of course your computer crashed, you threw it out the third floor window.'

'Are you still frustrated with the computer, dear?'

User-Unfriendly

'I had to confiscate the rubber band gun I made for Max. Now he won't speak to me. . .for a little guy he's got a huge cold shoulder.'

'My computers down again!'

"Sorry to bother you but I can't ask my son for computer help while he's in a in time out."

"To return to the original menu say say 'Goddam son of a bitch!'"

'Our mother, I'm so pent up with rage I could twitter!'

'His pacemaker keeps opening and shutting the garage door.'

"Getting the WiFi to Work"

"His jaw got stuck when he tried to bring me the Sunday paper!"

'For Pete's sake, can't you just tell me instead of emailing me?'

Always when you're busy!

"Every time I got frustrated with my computer, I would slam on the keyboard. This time the keyboard fought back."

'I don't mind the obscene phone calls. But I object to them reversing the charges.'