Tech-savvy Tweeters Gifts

The late bird orders a take away.

"No, I don't believe your teacher said you could stay home while she live tweets today's lessons."

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

'...honestly I just feel like we don't communicate like we used to!'

"Dad's got a promotion. How can now mute middle management."

'Can't we handle this through more impersonal channels like text messaging?'

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

'Uh, yeah, the picture resolution is great.'

Giggle.

"We're in a dying industry, and you're just sitting there! Well, I'm going to do something about it-I'm starting a Web site."

"The fact that I have multiple personalities and none of them are computer literate is depressing."

"I can't remember, did you text me, call me, tweet me, email me, or just tell me about it?"

Google signwriter.

"After seeing the benefits of web analytics, Amy hoped to learn something by attaching cookies to customers who visited her store."

Our manicure special today is 'Text Message Tips.' I contour your nails so you can hit all those tiny little keys!

"The reason they seem so small is because you have all 12,000 employees on your Zoom meeting."

'You'll be fine. Take two aspirin and call, fax, text or email me in the morning.'

"I'm disabling autocorrect, because it reminds me too much of my mother-in-law."

"Let's just say that you're not trending on any site on the internet!"

Shark SMS Text

'Romeo, Romeo, wi-fi art thou, Romeo...'

Requiem

"You will have to text your order directly to chef. We're not speaking."

Humpty Dumpty sat on a paywall.

'I'm just going online...'

'No, I mean, what's a 'letter'?'

"There is no 'virtual arrest button', you'll have to get off your butt and do it manually."

"Idolistentopodcastsatdoublespeed. How'dyouknow?"

"Peter's a man of few tweets, but many social media platforms."

Man video conferencing - "Shall we all meet up after this?"

"I just got a text from my teenage daughter. Do you speak emoji?"

Building Community Seminar.

'My job is being cut, I'm being replaced by a podcast,'

'Email, fax, phone, text or courier?'