Tech-savvy Skeptic Pillows

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."

"Pay no attention to Carlson. He's all tweet and no google."

"I hate these tablets - when I dine out I want a waiter I can snap at!"

"It's a tickertape app for late adopters."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

I.T. Fear

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

"And may I now introduce Professor Muckenspucker, who is an authority on artificial stupidity."

'And the best thing about this electric thermal underwear is, no batteries, it's solar!'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Computer Class.

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

"I'd like to see you do this online."

God's Phone

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

Privacy

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"Fifty years in academia, studying, researching, writing and teaching. And what do they call me? ‘The Human AI’."

We need to see him because there's no satellite-based system to guide us on a trip down the path to enlightenment.

Censorship? We Don't Do That Here.

I downloaded Thoreau's "Civil Disobedience" into it's memory, and now the "command" key isn't working.

"We need to rethink our strategy of hoping the Internet will just go away."

How Grandma Sees the Remote

"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."

Domestic Spying Drones