Tech Savvy Show-offs Pillows

'It's Jones Sir! He's showing of his ball point pen again!'

Man runs into Bigfoot taking a selfie.

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

Highlights From The Annual Central Park Country Fair

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

'It's the newest thing out. A big screen fish finder.'

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

"I have no feelings about having no feelings."

"We're in a dying industry, and you're just sitting there! Well, I'm going to do something about it-I'm starting a Web site."

"Before we decide that SEO is dead, can someone tell me what SEO is?"

"It's good to be able to recognize everyone."

"It's expensive because it connects to the internet."

'My dad just invented the wheel!'

Space Tours. Ernie, in this interview promoting your space tours, you didn't acknowledge the first test rocket was vaporized in a huge launch pad explosion. I said "The first test yielded spectacular results!" There's nothing about your lack of a system to provide oxygen for the travelers. I informed people "the experience will leave you breathless!" Lots of your technology is straight out of the 19th century! I said "Come be a pioneer!" It seems most of your company's effort went into th

"Pull over, Rudolph! We'll have to charge the electric sleigh again..."

'Actually, we're having trouble finding people to test the damn thing.'

"Now, you show me yours"

"Honey, will you text grace, please?"

"My phone is my cosmetic advisor. If the facial recognition doesn't work, I know I'm wearing too much makeup."

'After 5 minutes it turns itself off and says: 'Get a life!''

"Either you're emitting the scent of power, or your phone battery is about to explode."

'It's Jopnes Sir! He's showing off his ballpoint pen again!'

'Romeo, Romeo, wi-fi art thou, Romeo...'

'Oh no, not another tweet!'

The Daily Planet: The Newspaper that listen to you.

Today's Babysitter

"The doctor will see you shortly—in the meantime, please fill out your medical Google search history."

"I wonder what our clients are doing out there."

Vanity for the Surveillance Camera

"If God had meant for man to interact rationally He wouldn't have given them internet forums."

Careful - Ginger left the sniffing app open, and it shared her scent with everyone.

"I like this place. You can charge your phone AND save the rainforest."

"You know how it is. Some days you like to drive, some days you like to be driven."

How to appear more interesting.