Tech-savvy Joke Lover Prints

'The diagnostic computer thinks it's a punishment from God.'

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

"I'd like to TikTok your offer and get comments before saying yes or no."

"I haven't the slightest idea who he is. He came bundled with the software."

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

I've always been slower than computers...

"I didn't know they made a 'Sitbit'"

'No Jenkins! I said we need to start using the Cloud! The C-L-O-U-D!'

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

"That guys is stealing my data!"

Noah posted his first tweet.

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

Isn't it cool? I printed out my reply to your raise request using the 3-D printer! NO!

I hear you're sending Rudy to a clandestine meeting with Russian agents for the purpose of coordinating the blackmailing of the American president. What?! I am not! What ever gave you such an outlandish idea? I overheard Rudy asking Siri "How do I say 'hello' in Russian?" That proves nothing. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'my boss wants your boss to blackmail our president' in Russian?" That could mean anything. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'that means exactly what it sounds like it means

"I wish you'd stop obsessively checking your feed!"

B2B.Com Pay Per View.

"Remember, the password is case sensitive."

'Universal remote, my eye!'

"Our records show that you unsubscribed to our company's e-newsletter. We need to have a little talk."

'By putting all our data into code, our competitors can't read it, our unathorized personnel can't read it, and I'm afraid, neither can we.'

"The are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't."

Knights of the iPhone

I didn't see who attacked me, but that's the guy who got it all on his phone.

Last Chance To take Selfie For All Eternity.

"Be careful of what you say. The CEO is listening in."