Tech-savvy Joey Gifts

'What?!'

'The check is in the email attachment.'

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

The Digital Family

"Phyllis, this isn�t my laptop..."

"Getting dark, Sweetie. Better text Mom you love her."

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

'Don't worry about the thumb sucking...she'll be texting with it soon enough.'

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

"I haven't the slightest idea who he is. He came bundled with the software."

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

"Don't worry about her sucking her thumb. Soon she'll be texting with it."

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

I've always been slower than computers...

"What do you think is a good step goal for someone who's just started walking?"

"Go ahead—unmute yourself."

James Gandolfini in his driveway with a tablet

'No Jenkins! I said we need to start using the Cloud! The C-L-O-U-D!'

'I'm a work-at-home dad.'

'Yes, technology has come a long way, but the baby won't have a touch screen.'

"So that's two votes for save and one for delete."

"How many times do I have to beep you?"

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

"I figure we can blue-screen the kids in later."

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

"All this time I've been trying to get her to walk, and all it took was a phone."

'So tell me again. Why can't you sit on the eggs and tweet at the same time?'