Tech Cynic Prints

'I'll tell you, Ed, this new technology is starting to realy spook me out.'

Don't worry, Bob. There are some jobs a robot just can't do...like kissing ass.

Free at last from all forms of electronic and digital interconnectedness!

iPhone: Leading Our Grand March Into Mass Mediocrity

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

"Fifty years in academia, studying, researching, writing and teaching. And what do they call me? ‘The Human AI’."

Domestic Spying Drones

"We've now got a higher approval rating than the media."

"Dear, if the news stresses you out so much, turn it off!"

"So what is the true need for this project?" "To make me look good."

"Trust me, there is no subsidized lunch."

'Someone is reading our emails. I'm afraid this means we're going to have to talk to each other.'

'My goal is to be a failure and accept a colossal golden parachute.'

"If you are a Pulitzer-prize winner, press 1. All others, please press 2."

'This must be the Sea of Tranquility.'

Unsocial Networking.

"Well, if you can't trust software upgrades, who can you trust?"

"Just saying, if you can't trust your software upgrades, what can you trust?"

"To increase consumer optimism, we're going to put Prozac in the drinking water."

"Somewhere along the line the world got a whole lot dorkier."

The first accurate poll.

If They See Something, They Do Something — To You

'Dad, is it true what they say about lemmings following each other off a cliff?' 'If they work at a company like mine, it is.'

"So much for the news, now for the corrections."

'I don't revere this guy because he founded the company. He's the one who tried to talk me out of getting into this business in the first place.'

'It's like home from home, really-rubbish telly, lousy grub..'

"Ahem, if you're planning to rob the place could you please get a move on."

Finally, a news network that doesn't fill me up...it's 97 fact free!

Warning! The next programme contains no celebrities.

"I'd better read the official view before I form an opinion."

Corporate recycle: plastic/paper/empty promises.

'I told you that thing would mess up the environment!'