Teaching Manners Pillows

"People come to the park to relax. If you want to run wild yelling your head off, wait until we're at a nice restaurant."

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

"Hey, you two! What did I say about sharing?!"

'Honey, we don't stare.'

'Mommy! Larry's making faces again!'

'For Heaven's sake Son, you're embarassing me! This is a feeding frenzy!'

''Casual Friday' does not mean you may unbutton your lip!'

Teach Love

'Oh, yes, you will get off!'

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

"Oh no! Didn't you bring your phone?"

Not very ladylike. Please help.

'I thanked my teacher for teaching me so well, and she fainted.'

"Soup should be seen and not heard!"

"If anyone ever asks...it's hard to eat soup with a fork."

'Would you please stop struggling? You're damaging my web!'

"Mum says I've got to thank you if you gave me anything."

"Bob, remove the nuts from your cheeks before you start talking: I can't understand a word you say!"

"And remember, the phone goes to the left of the entree fork."

'Just because you happen to turn into a wolf during a full moon, dear, doesn't mean you have to act like one!'

Butler and Page Boy

"Down."

Vicar and four young ladies

'It was a complete surprise when the table-setting police arrived. I had no idea I was doing it wrong.'

'Hold your hand in front of your mouth when you yawn.' - 'What, and take a chance of getting bitten.'

'That's Ludwig II, not Ludwig JUNIOR!'

'Say it, don't spray it.'

"This seat is reserved for the rest of my legs."

'Wall hugging won't get you past me without a 'Good morning', Carson.'

'He invented the table, and I invented the manners.'

Smartphone Abuse