Taxpayer Advocate Gifts

Budget Cuts Guillotine: Next!

'Shouldn't we be INVESTING some of this?'

Least Popular Governor, Most Expensive Portrait

It's fine to hate Congress, little buddy, but you have to have a reason. The ladies dig a guy who has reasons. Well … they won't fix that pothole in that street I never use. That got fixed last year. Then they're pouring my tax dollars into holes! What a waste! Keep trying.

It's great fun spending your tax dollars!: 'He's getting WAY overconfident!'

"Perhaps later on we can go back to my psychiatrist's office for some couples therapy?"

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

If these are your medications, what happened to the beads I bought?

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

'Occasionally the Dr. asks me to get real with people.'

I don't think we can survive here. There's little chance we can afford the taxes.

IRS Audits. That's your fourth "honest" mistake in a row!

"I'm prescribing a patch. It will dispense meds as permitted by your insurance company."

"The truth is, doctor, I've lost faith in Western medicine."

"Marions nous! Tu payes les impôts, j'offre le resto!"

I'm tired of your games, Al. MY games? look who's talking! The guy with the role-playing hand puppets!

"Try letting the ball come to you."

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

"So tell me more about the dog sitter."

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

"I've run every test known to man, and it turns out you're allergic to medical bills."

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

'We do spend a lot and tax a lot, but it's the price you pay for living in a money-based economy.'

Last Road Rage Therapist for 500 Miles

'Well, well. You made more money last year than you did the year before -- You people never learn, do you?'

Handicap parking sign for person in hospital bed.

"I can't stop conducting random security checks."

"Today workers in socialistic economies sought private sector solutions. Workers in predominantly private sector economies want more socialism."

Corruption, Apathy, & Mediocrity...

'Let me though! - I'm a Doctor.'