Taxonomy Tinker T-Shirts

What is this? "Entada Gigas." Okay. And that is "Eunectes Murinus." Yikes! "Pygocentrus Nattereri"! Gasp! Oh, heavens, "Panthera Onca"! Can you put all of this in layman's terms? "It's a jungle out there"!

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

Thinking Gears

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

Drool Marks

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'3-D TV Kit'

Sistine Selfie

Fur Baby

'No, you can't play Space Invaders in it.'

Filling the Missile Gap

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

"Oh, puhleeese. No one's going to steal your idea."

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'I think the professor is trying out the theory of relativity... trying to make time fly!'

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

"We think we got some good CT scans, but unfortunately they're encrypted and our I.T. guy is on vacation this week."

Technology and literature

Bot Art: After Mary Cassatt

"Prove you're not a human Select the squares with a bike Skip"

'But I did study. I guess the software didn't install successfully.'

"Before automation how did humans endure work?"

We've already got one. A hidden microphone in the staff coffee area.

Car Dentistry.

"All my gadgets are old. I'd like some new gadgets."

"Never marry an engineer."

Recombinant DNA Lab. To-da! The palindromedary!