Twig Tinker T-Shirts

'I'm all in favour of alternative medicine, using boiled twigs and chanting has cut our drug budget in half.'

Thinking Gears

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

Drool Marks

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

Sistine Selfie

"If we can't find the way forward, let's find the way back."

'The New... New, Swiss Army Knife.'

'Your report card grades are poor. Maybe you should stop building model airplanes. The glue is getting to you.'

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Technology and literature

Joys of D.I.Y.

"All my gadgets are old. I'd like some new gadgets."

'I'm afraid this is going to lead to regulation of my invention.'

"I told you we needed deeper foundations!"

Uranium, heavy water? Where on the web did you say you got the plans for this birdhouse?

'Sander's a bit high isn't it?'

"Any beaver can cut down trees, but marquetry, now that's art."

"Why run the maze when you don't have to?"

Our Computer is Up/Down.

December 17, 1903: We miraculously devise a craft that can transport human beings though the sky. December 18, 1903: We figure out how to use said craft to kill people.

"When you think of it, all you really need is one 3D printer to start manufacturing them yourself!"

Solar car with automatic navigation system, automatically choosing sunny routes.

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

"The new system is 100% accurate as long as the client is called Colin and lives in Swindon."

"I think we've been wasting out time testing phones on rats. We already know phones are addictive."

"Now, you show me yours"

'... I'll take the handoff to the tailback, then give the ball to my stunt double here, and he will dive head-first into the end zone.'

Woodwork

What is this? "Entada Gigas." Okay. And that is "Eunectes Murinus." Yikes! "Pygocentrus Nattereri"! Gasp! Oh, heavens, "Panthera Onca"! Can you put all of this in layman's terms? "It's a jungle out there"!

"Great prototype, but I asked for a grate prototype."