Tax Wizardry Enthusiast Pillows

Sherlock Holmes, CPA: 'Incredible deductions, Mr Holmes! You've saved the Watson family big money!'

And why are you enrolling in an accounting course? Well, one day...I hope to get a loophole named after me.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

"Look at that – they’re retreating!"

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

'... And I appreciate that you've 'saved the world from certain doom on numerous occasions', but you still have to pay your taxes.'

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

'You realize, of course, Death is the ultimate tax shelter?'

Osborne's Tax Cuts

New Improved I.R.S.

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."

'We're all wearing them - they were a gift from Warren Buffett.'

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

'We learned today that the world is a huge ball, which revolves on it's taxes.'

Stimulus bust