Tax-saving Strategist Gifts

"Save tax loopholes!"

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

Investing your savings

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"Good news. Your medical prognosis is right in sync with your retirement portfolio."

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

"So, you want your owners to write you off and treat you more like their kid?"

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

"And this financial plan is specifically designed for people who know their retirement -- IF they get one -- won't be half as good as their parents' retirement, and are really steamed about it!"

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

If this carries on we're going to lose all our tax losses.

"You know what I hate about getting older? I don't have the reflexes to dodge taxes like I used to."

"Let's just say the value of your account has gone from jumbo to fun size."

'Keep a lid on it!'

"Safe FDIC insured, guaranteed 2.65% APY...check out our new Emotional Support CDs."

Nest Egg

"With the rises in fuel, food and mortgage I'm going to have to put in some overtime."

'They are like family...they're my family of retirement funds.'

The Mattress Savings Bank

'Damn! I was saving that for a rainy day!'

'A tax audit? I out sourced my books, records and book keeping to India months ago.'

'I'm worth more than $3,000 as a federal income tax exemption. So how about a raise in my allowance?'

Rolling Over a Pension.

'I already have money. I need advice on how to keep it and make it last.'