Tax Returner Gifts

"Today, we will talk about your phony numbers. We will not talk about the I.R.S. having too many cooks!"

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

"About your tax refund—would you like to donate it to help pay off the national debt?"

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'

IRS agent to lady: 'Your refund was delayed because of shredded paperwork ... but we're putting it all together with red tape.'

"Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing!"

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

"It's the government, they've spent all our taxes and want to know if we can send them some more."

"Brrr - it was so cold today I had my hands in my own pockets instead of someone elses!"

'He's testing my Hippocratic Oath. He wors for the IRS.'

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

'Well that's a load off my mind. Osborne's cutting the 50p tax rate.'

'About this obscene material found in your desk.'

irs, 'You were wrong -- they WEREN'T more afraid of me than I was of them.'

A Tax Auditor Prescribes Treatment For A Doctor's Condition

"We invested everything we had in our marriage."

"There's the man who ripped my Rolex off my wrist!"

"Oh, no. Death AND taxes."

IRS Taking Candy From A Baby

'This is what I call the ultimate in money laundering.'

'To be or not to be . . . contingent on royal funding.'

"It's about all the treasure laid up here."

"Oh boy, am I never glad to see you."

"Be careful - these things have consequences. Tax consequences."

All cheats are equal, but some are more equal than others.

Large bear population in Canada.

'While I can certainly understand your predicament Miss Goodbody, I can't see the Inspector allowing Tax Relief on wear and tear on your shoe leather, caused by running around your desk at work when you are being chased by your employer!'

' Why that's just uncanny!.As soon as I set eyes on you,I just knew that you worked for the inland revenue ! '

'I'm afraid you're going to have to stay with us for a thousand years, but your sins are tax-deductible.'

'We invested everything we had in our marriage.'

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

'Darling...our first audit!'

"Thar someone from the IRS blows!"

IRS, 'Remember back when 'debt to society' referred to criminals?'