Tax Evasion Artist Gifts

"Speeding? Impossible. I'm on my way to my tax audit!"

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

"These are all my financial papers - with the exception of the codes to my secret Swiss bank accounts, of course."

Panama Papers Scandal

Do you want this set of books, or the set you keep in the broom cupboard?

"It's part of a deal I worked out with the I.R.S."

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

Money laundering.

"I moved to the coast to get away from the Inland Revenue..."

Little Taxes.

'She didn't marry him for his looks or personality - she needed his debts for a tax write-off!'

'No, you can't write off the cost of your wake-up call service.'

"Never go to a church during a hurricane. They only provide shelter from taxes."

'I made my fortune the old fashioned way - concealing it from the government.'

"The public seems concerned about the size of government."

'Just because I can explain the theory of relativity doesn't mean I understand the tax code.'

"My bill isn't terribly controversial. It would provide modest tax breaks for people who don't really need them."

Accountant's Awards - "Our next award is for 'Tax Loophole of the Year'..."

"Is that before or after tax?"

"Chris, find a safe and fast way into lucrative tax heavens!"

"If it's the I.R.S., tell them: Not a penny! Not a centime! Not a sou!"

"According to our information you have placed a looted treasure in an undiscovered land..."

'I've found an Inheritance Tax loophole!' - Immortality.

'First the good news - we don't have to pay any corporate taxes this year.'

'That was devious and despicable... keep up the good work.'