Tax Code Explorer T-Shirts

'What burns me is those bums who evade US taxes by being born in some foreign country and just staying there!'

The transparent safe box of Panama

Tax professionals brushing up on the tax code during election year.

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

'I feel I owe a lot to my country.' - 'So, you haven't paid your income tax again.'

'I tried forgetting about life's little stresses and I got busted for tax evasion.'

I have a degree in philosophy and can't get a job. Can I deduct my tuition as an investment loss?

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

"Says, property of the I.R.S."

"I still have my loophole, but I can't drive a truck through it."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

"Taxation, meet Representation."

You may go free, to worry about tax and the economy like the rest of us.

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

"I see you've arranged your life and business so that you can deduct everything. Do you know the penalty for 'trying to beat the system'?"

"Hi, I'm Bob Darrel. I'm here to perform the audit of your books. Don't mind the vultures. They follow me everywhere."

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

The Meaning of Life/Tax Avoidance Advice.

I.R.S. - Attention Investors! Remember to 'Buy low, sell high' so we can collect capital gains tax!

Monster under the bed.

"It's hard to deal with because it keeps mutating... not the virus... tax law!"

"At last, a country that welcomes poor refugees like me..."

'First, I want you to get your dependents off my desk.'

"We invested everything we had in our marriage."

'I wonder if I can declare you as dependents on my income taxes?'

'We struck these tax laws, but they somehow spontaneously regenerated into line 501(c), section 746-e, subsection (3), as described in paragraph (2).'

"It's funny how two intelligent people can have such opposite interpretations of the tax code!"

'...and then you smile and say...all together now...'that's not deductible.'.'

'...I also do some work for the tax department.'

"If you have to ask what a loophole is, you probably can't afford it."

Retrofitting Tax Loopholes Since 1968.

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty to tax evasion by reason of math phobia.'