Tape Sleuth Pillows

Tale of the Tape

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

Statistics Research: You Can Fool 45% of the People 55% of the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time.

music store

While Desmond was by far the world's fastest marathon runner, his Achilles heel was his wimpiness.

Conflicting Reports

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

"I wore a wire last night to prove you really snore!"

Playing dead is easy, but when they ask me to speak, I have to imagine them in their underwear.

You're right, Jenkins, the numbers don't lie. Get me some that do.

'Wow, Professor Jones, that's an impressive back-of-the-envelope calculation!'

"My libido?...What the hell does this even mean?"

"After viewing the video footage, it wasn't the dog making the mess, after all..."

"We don't sell CDs anymore. We sell colorful jackets for the music you download illegally."

"If a tree fell into the marsh and there was nobody around to hear it and it landed on a mute swan, would it make a sound?"

You're being watched.

'You haven't confirmed the Superstring theory, Blumenkraft - this is a whisker from your beard!'

"We didn't realize the CCTV footage was doctored until our precinct fanboy found a continuity mistake."

Arthur Conan Doyle

Idenity Parade.

Reporter #2: plant.

Reporter at a crime scene.

Ducttape Man! I'll mend your broken heart!

'Cops and Rubbers.'

'Pete and I have what we call the '80 percent duct tape rule'. Once something is patching up with 80 percent duct tape, I can toss it.'

"I'm looking for justice."

'So there I was, alone in the aisle, heart pounding, without a bloody clue as to what wine I should bring our hosts.'

Wow! He can hear a song just once and then play it? Yeah, he has a phonographic memory!

'I'm not paying for another misspelling, and give me back the rhngchtanza!'

Shoot Your Mouth Off.